The Gentle 'No'

We discuss repeatedly what it means to the individual to be able to say 'no' when refusing something away from themselves. This is an interesting subject because there are several ways we can do this, with several differing outcomes.

If for example I am struck by another person with a blow intentionally aimed at me, I have the right per se to hit back, even perhaps using more force than was given to me. Once that first hit has been initiated, then I may answer it in rebuttal. Equally so I may choose not to react at all. I am not obliged to hit back, even though I can. By being able to hit back, but not doing so, I am actually deciding to be gentle.

Little children are far from gentle. Their 'no's are also as strong as the hit of a naturally won rebuttal. In the story of Courtesy, Propriety and Decorum we have strong imagery of that individual who cannot operate outside of their limited scope. Like a child who really does not comprehend what they are dealing with, there is a destructive outcome if mere practice is all that there is as a model of behavior.

The stronger the 'I Am' is developed within the individual, the more gentle their 'no' is pronounced. It is however very definite nonetheless and completely valid for them to say and act upon.

'No' is a given within the free-will of Man - its manner of delivery is a chosen.

Love is Gentle

Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great.

- Psalms 18:35

Love is gentle, and Gentle is Love.

The Parting of the Waters Gently

When we appeal to Nature we are caused to be gentle. There is nothing in nature we can actually force or turn. Gentleness is an asking of a kind, for a consent within the interaction. Our imaginative processes are indeed gentle also. Meditation and contemplation, imaging and prayerfulness, these attitudes of being require gentleness before entering into their gifts and properties on offer to
us. 

By this we can now know what it feels like in the experience of parting even the great waters before us. You can go to the gentle aspect you know in the quiet of prayer and take this to other tasks equally well. The doors to the mysteries require a gentle applicant, it is not enough to have just a methodical or ritual appearance of gentility (Courtesy, Propriety and Decorum) but that we have an inner disposition of Gentleness, founded on true Love and Knowledge, rather than appearance and practice alone.

Courtesy, Propriety & Decorum with the Gentle

 

There once was a castle steeped in clouds upon the highest hilltop. Inside of this castle lived Courtesy, Propriety and Decorum. Every day a messenger-bird would alight upon the outermost turret and bring them news from the valleys below. Every day also, the little messenger-bird would take back a letter from the three. Courtesy would write 'Dear' at the beginning, Propriety would compose the content, and Decorum would scent the paper lightly, and then seal it with a modest yet dignified insignia. 

One day there came an envelope, when upon opening, out fell a rock dropping onto the ground before them. No words on parched paper this time, just a rock. "What shall we do with it?" they asked themselves.

Courtesy took the rock and threw it at the bird.

Propriety took the bird and wrapped it in a pure white sheet.

Decorum embroidered an emblem for its wrapping. 

The small parcel sat on the stone wall for three days. 

Courtesy, Propriety and Decorum had gone to the turret each day - largely from habit - wanting very badly to receive yet one more letter to then respond to. But of course nothing came.

Below where the parcel lay was a little recess in the wall, a very small but dark hole. Courtesy noticed something in there. Propriety pushed a thin twig into it and moved the object around. Decorum lifted it out. It was a tiny sky-blue egg.

"What shall we do with it?" they asked themselves.

Courtesy moved toward the egg, wanting to touch this new prize, but it fell from Courtesy and smashed messily in a spill. Propriety cleaned it up. Decorum made a lacquer with the contents, using the paste with thin leaves of gold to now decorate the little parcel still lying on the turret wall.

A day or an age or so later (it was very difficult to tell in that faraway place) a great eagle came to visit. It had been scouting around looking for the little messenger-bird, concerned for its welfare, not having returned some time ago. 

The eagle appeared not to notice or comprehend the small white gold-embellished embroidered package, but instead addressed the three with his pressing question.

"I am looking for the little messenger-bird, have you seen him, do you know of his whereabouts?"

The three took this question, and asked themselves, "What do I do with this?"

Courtesy blushed, Propriety stammered and Decorum stood stiffly composed. "Have you brought us any letters?" they asked hopefully.